I think I am kind of glad that mindsay has become a little corner tucked away from all the mainstream social networking sites. It makes me feel kind of comfortable and safe to say what I please, while still maintaining the satisfaction that I have emptied my mind for awhile. And, let me tell you, it has been far too long. My life has take a tipsy turvy ride over the last year or so since I last typed an entry. Now, being a junior in college, I am afraid I have gained a worldliness I never desired nor expected. The people, the things, the places to which I have been exposed have given me a slight sense of hopelessness in this world. But at the same time I am ever so content in my direction for future careers. I have since realized, or re-realized many dreams. And I have also come to accept the fact that not everyone I am close to can accept who I am changing into, nor can they be intertwined into my dreams of a future. With a little bit of regret I am beginning to get a clearer view of all my naivety when I thought that my friends would be friends for good. I see that love has no answers which are easy. And I have trouble figuring out which answers to believe. Perhaps, in place of all my profound and well practiced wisdom, I have simply found more questions. Such is life.
For now,
Julie
It's always me and my big dreams
Well. tumble through a few months on the calendar and I find myself well into a second semester worth of college. College is not what I expected nor is it the big bad scary monster I kind of saw it as in August. I find that the life I left behind is not really all that great a loss in terms of the people I gave my heart to, the people I feel I cannot live without and those who made it a point to stay in touch. I miss the FACS high school years nonetheless however much Gardner Webb seems to be a continuation of them. I needn't go on and on about the experiences I've had. I believe I will remember them long after mindsay quits sayin' my mind.
for now, that is all.
As always....
Isaiah 40:31
August looks a little lonely
Theres too much going on
and my first encounter with college reading is not going so well. Louisiana is a depressing state in case you hadn't heard and now i have to get back to it.
word to the wise, sometimes you CAN judge a book by its cover.
"Don't worry, I'm a lifeguard!"
...but not really so dont drown.
Oh summer.
Bonfires and rope swings, build-a-bear and a few sweet dreams, down the bayou and around the pool, paintball and the beautiful sport of beach volleyball, sunburns that turn to tans, never learning to take life slow, backyard football and a birdie or two, sidewalk chalk and enough pizza for all the fat kids i know, packing and XL twin sheets, spending my last graduation present and missing WAY too many movie nights, dates and the not-so lunch dates, dinoco lightning mcqueen and the bad black spiderman, knives and scissors for a first job and perhaps the shortest lived one yet, putting away all the memories of the "b.b" and free ice cream every friday, the boy who never goes away and the horror stories of the clinical class, missing some and putting that all to rest, looking forward to college and passing an AP test =) scholarships here and there and amazing clearance racks, meeting the 7 foot tall ben and going to the beach.....
these are a few of my favorite things.
I'm glad none of that made sense to you
MindSay Quick Update /
I am feeling ...ambitious
No more Price is Right =/
My marriage age is 26. We'll see how that turns out =)
How old are you going to be when you get married?
[x] You know how to make a pot of coffee
[x] You keep track of dates using a calendar
[] You own more than one credit card
[] You know how to change the oil in a car
[x] You've done your own laundry
[ ] You vote in every election
[x if a microwave counts] You can cook for yourself
[ ] You think politics are exciting
TOTAL SO FAR:4
[x] You show up for school/college/work early {only if I have to}
[x] You always carry a pen in your bag/purse/pocket
[x] You've never gotten a detention
[] You have forgotten your own birthday at least once
[x] You like to take walks by yourself
[x] You've watched talk shows
[x] You know what 'credibility' means without looking it up
[x....y....z.....] You drink coffee at least once (times twenty) a week
TOTAL SO FAR: 11
[x] You know how to do the dishes
[x] You can count to 10 in another language...Woohoo pig latin =)
[x] When you say you're going to do something you do it (except for that time I said I was gonna be a cosmetologist)
[x] My guardians trust me
[x] You can mow the lawn
[x] You can make adults laugh without being stupid....i question this sometimes
[x] You remember to water the plants
[x] You study when you have to
TOTAL SO FAR: 19
[x] you can spell 'experience' without looking it up
[x] You work out on a regular basis
[x] you clean up your own mess
[ ] the people at Starbucks know you by name (=) i'm close.)
[x] Your favorite kind of food is take out
[x] You have gained weight since elementary school
[] The first thing you do when you wake up is get caffeine
[] You can go to the store without getting something you don't need
TOTAL SO FAR: 24
[] You have realized that the weather forecast changes every hour
[] Your only friends are from your place of employment
[] You have been to a tupperware party
[] You have realized that no one will take you seriously unless
you are over the age of 25 and have a job
[ ] You have more bills than you can pay
[] Most of all your friends are older than you are
[x] You can say no to staying out all night
[x] you use the internet every day
TOTAL ADDED UP: 26
Yah, you betcha thats a bulletin =)
I'm becoming more and more glad to be through with the high school scene. The things I miss...well, I have some great memories, at least. The people that mean the most have stayed in touch =) And the rest, I'm just glad to leave it all behind.
hehe...this is what I did all week.... three year old drama queens ;-D
1 Corinthians 2:9
"No eye has seen,
no ear has heard,
no mind has conceived
what God has prepared for those who love him."
Long late night talks in applebees parking lots
Escuse me while I reminisce.
The list of things that I am going to miss about high school is far too long to list. Ill give it a whirl :
The lunch table. yes i am going to miss the metal/wooden/plastic thing we sat at everyday. It was my favorite table in the whole school.
Ill also miss the people who sat there with me.
Sports. oh man. volleyball. the stupid jokes we had. making fun of our coaches. um shanking and any other form of embarassment. our ace cheer, our smoked turkey cheer, our get out of her house cheer. Every cheer in general. basketball. slapping brittany gallman in the face.
i think ill even miss ttu...those were good days. the year every girl got hit on. making sure the younger kids didnt talk to boys. getting into a fight. dixie cups.
Art class... and my three favorite goofy guys in it. make fun of ashley debnam day. be nice to ashley day. the power of a duke hat. my very own octupus. the potters wheel ending up on the ceiling. getting a concussion. the time matt dropped an exacto knife and it opened at my flipflopped feet. the time i slapped... well. yeh. walkers soundtracks. ap. venting. messing up artwork. never being done. walking up the hill. doug ferguson. enough said.
drama. yeh, weird huh? the good, the bad and the ugly boys. the catfights. gossip. the facs grapevine. ....i on't cur.
Thats what she saids. yeh, theyre terrible. but im gonna miss them anyway.
the sportscenter parties. hahahahah
teachers. most people dont agree, but we were blessed as far as teachers go. mr. c.
lockers. ugly, tan lockers. they served me well.
pranks. =) what a great year of those."hey we're at concord mills"
NET NANNY. oh wait. no i wont.
most of all. friends. the kind that last forever, and im scared they wont. the kind that you can have hour long conversations with in a parking lot for no reason. yeh, im gonna miss them the most.
So that's all folks. Fourteen years of moments, memories, friends, that became family, love, food, laughter, tears, pain, drives, naps, crushes, trips, pictures, summers, work, heartbreak, stories, papers, walks, books, cars, teachers, overload, stress, sports, homework, learning, experiences, proms, dances, lunches. EVERYTHING. fourteen years and I finished it all today. Still waiting on it to hit me....
I've been here before, now here I am again
Standing at the door, praying You'll let me back in
To label me a prodigal would be
Only scratching the surface of who I've been known to be
Turn me around pick me up
Undo what I've become
Bring me back to the place
Of forgiveness and grace
I need You, need Your help
I can't do this myself
You’re the only one who can undo
What I've become
I focused on the score, but I could never win
Trying to ignore, a life of hiding my sin
To label me a hypocrite would be
Only scratching the surface of who I've been known to be
Make every step lead me back to
The sovereign way that You
I had one of the great weekends ever. A top fiver. I guess its about time I realized how much living life is sometimes a no-strings-attached kinda deal. =)
=) * =) * =) * =)
If I cherish the new while I have it, perhaps, I won't lose it — at least not for something less.
And if I cherish what I keep, perhaps, I won't miss what I have lost.
Content Whatever the Circumstances
PHIL 4:10-14 Actually, I don't have a sense of needing anything personally. I've learned by now to be quite content whatever my circumstances. I'm just as happy with little as with much, with much as with little. I've found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am. I don't mean that your help didn't mean a lot to me—it did. It was a beautiful thing that you came alongside me in my troubles.
"Walking away from something means believing for something more. And if I want something more, I must believe it's out there (or in here). Would God give me a desire that he could not fill? "
"I am sometimes disappointed, but I love my life ... and I must believe that the disappointments contribute something to what I love."
“Sometimes you don't know what you're missing until you reach out to touch it.
Sometimes you can't see how beautiful something is until it steps back into the light.
And sometimes you miss a love you almost didn't lose.
But when you need beauty, dream.”
^...it sounds deep anyway...
Jesus paid it all
All to Him I owe
Sin had left a crimson stain
He washed it white as snow
There will never be someone else who dares to give everything up simply for the sake of my life. Why in the world would i not then give everything up to Him?
